By Lara Monica Magat
It’s been 6 years since I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
It’s 3:15PM and I see a friend’s message that reads, “How are you?”
Ever since the enhanced community quarantine was implemented in Metro Manila, I can’t recall how many times I’ve been asked that very question. Numerous people have reached out to check how I’ve been coping — or if I’m coping at all.
Each time, I struggle finding my words. It’s been 6 years since I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Naturally, I’m probably not doing okay — I’m probably struggling more than the others.
Processing my mental state, in my repeated attempts to come up with a response, prompted a realization. Contrary to what’s “expected,” I am actually doing okay. Anxiety is something that I deal with most of the time, so I know exactly how to manage it.
Of course, anxiety is not exclusive to those with disorders. This pandemic threatens several aspects of our lives; therefore, feeling anxious is quite a normal response. To those who are still struggling, I thought it might be worth sharing the methodical approach I learned through years of dealing with it.
Do notyour emotions as positive or negative, right or wrong. They are all valid. Muscling your way through feeling otherwise will not help. Dismissing unpleasant emotions and burying them with “positive thoughts” will not make them go away. It will just catch up on you and still manifest itself one way or another.
It’s okay if you haven’t been feeling positive. It’s okay that you do not have the motivation to be productive. These are unprecedented times and so you can’t expect yourself to function like you would on a normal day. Be gentle with yourself; allow yourself to just be.
Instead of immediately reacting to anxiety, take a moment to process your emotions. What exactly is it that you’re anxious about? Which specific aspect in your life do you feel is in peril? If there’s any consolation to this pandemic, it’s the time and space to revisit your thought patterns.
Anxiety may seem like a dark unfathomable cloud looming over us, but really, it’s just how we respond to personal triggers that we’re unconscious of. Ask yourself why endlessly and you might surprise yourself with the answer.
Why am I afraid? Because I feel unsafe. Why do I feel unsafe? And so on and so forth…
When you find your answer, you’ll have a better understanding of what specifically triggers your anxiety, then you can respond to it appropriately.
Needless to say, we can’t allow our anxiety to paralyze us. We need to access our ability to self-soothe. I think this is where “positive thinking” becomes appropriate — to think of something that elicits positivity in you.
Where do you find comfort? Is it in spending time with your family? Is it in doing something you’ve set aside for so long because you didn’t have the time? Is it in connecting with your friends? Is it in doing a specific physical activity? Whatever it is, it doesn’t have to be grand or complicated. It may be even as simple as drinking a cup of coffee in silence.
This pandemic is a form of change — the kind that is disruptive and does not wait until you’re fully adjusted to welcome it. With that change, comes the fear of the unknown. There’s a deluge of information on the news every day, and we‘re constantly faced with the question of what tomorrow will look like.
How do you typically cope with change? When was the last time you had to go through a sudden big change and how did you survive it? Recalling a similar experience in the past can help you access skills that you already have to navigate through these uncharted waters.
(Credit to Canva)
There’s a certain capacity of adaptability that this pandemic requires from all of us. I’ve observed people getting frustrated, trying to find some semblance of normalcy in their day-to-day activities. Again, let’s recognize that this pandemic is a form of change. How we define “normal” will most likely take a whole new shape and form once the pandemic blows over. There’s nothing wrong with feeling nostalgic; however, the sooner we let go of our definition of “normal,” the easier it will be to cope.
This pandemic is a traumatic experience that will need time for healing. We all need to gradually accept that the world has changed — and will mostly likely still continue changing. We don’t know what the future holds. We can only respond to matters at hand, so in the meantime, try avoiding planning long term (Shout out to my Type A friends! I see you!). Take it one day at a time and roll with the punches.
It’s almost 5:00PM and I took a minute to watch the sun set. The thought that there is constant movement in the universe comforts me whenever I feel stuck.
Keep in mind that anxiety is not a reflection of reality, more so of yourself. It’s simply a human response to a daunting situation, and like all things, it will pass. You’ll get through this.
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